Nu stiu nicio gluma despre UE, sincera sa fiu, in toate intalnirile mele, conferinte, seminarii, discutii informale, n-am auzit nicio gluma despre UE. Daca stiti vreuna, spuneti-mi-o si mie.
Do you know any jokes about the EU? I don't and nobody has ever told me. So, I am looking for EU jokes and any help would be very useful.
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http://julienfrisch.blogspot.com/2010/05/joke.html
RăspundețiȘtergereSe vorbeste "de bine" despre EEC in cateva episoade din genialul serial "Yes Minister" ("Yes Prime Minister"). Bate orice gluma :)
RăspundețiȘtergereDe exemplu: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-Xvy1r4Pm8
Intr-un avion erau Obama, Putin si van Rompuy...
RăspundețiȘtergereAs vrea sa continui cumva, dar parca n-are niciun haz!
"SOCIALISM: You have two cows. State takes one and give it to someone else.
RăspundețiȘtergereCOMMUNISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and gives you milk.
FASCISM: You have two cows. State takes both of them and sell you milk.
CAPITALISM: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
EUROPEAN FEDERALISM: You have two cows which you cannot afford to keep because of milk imported from a member state with cheaper labour. So you apply for financial aid from the European Union to subsidise your cows and are granted enough to carry on working them. You then sell your milk at the original high price to some government-owned distributor which then dumps your milk onto the market at the price that drove you to subsidies to make Europe competitive."
Un link cu câteva glume despre UE (printre care si cea cu vacile)
RăspundețiȘtergerehttp://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4755659.stm
The European Commission has announced an agreement whereby
RăspundețiȘtergereEnglish will be the official language of the EU, rather than
German, which was the other contender. Her Majesty's Government
conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has
therefore accepted a five-year phasing in of "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly,
this will make sivil servants jump for joy. The hard "c" will be
dropped in favour of the "k", Which should klear up some konfusion
and allow one key less on keyboards.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when
the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f", making words like
"fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be
expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are
possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters
which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil
agre that the horible mes of the silent "e" is disgrasful.
By the fourth yer, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as
replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer
kombinations of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli
sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and
everivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. ZE DREM VIL FINALI
COM TRU!
De obicei oamenii rîd de ceea ce le e frică mai tare. De aceea nu trebuie să ne îngrijoreze lipsa glumelor despre UE. E încă un semn bun.
RăspundețiȘtergereNu e nevoie de glume, UE e o gluma in sine.Foarte proasta, din pacate.
RăspundețiȘtergereWow, one of the best read posts so far.
RăspundețiȘtergereAnother cow story
RăspundețiȘtergere1. TRADIŢIONALCAPITALISM
You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. The heard is growing and the economical situation is better. You are selling them and retire with the profit.
2. American Co
You have two cows. You are selling one and are forcing the other to overproduce milk (like four cows); you are very surprised when the cow dies.
3. French Co
You have two cows. You enter in strike because you want to have three.
4. Japanese Co
You have two cows.You redesign them to be ten times smaller and to produce a multiplied by 20 quantities..Then you are making virtual cows, named Cowkemon and promote them on a global scale.
5. Germany company
You have two cows. You are selecting and design them to live 100 years , to eat once a day and to milk themselves.
6. English Co
You have two cows. Both are mad
7. Italian Co
You have two cows but you do not know where they are.You are leaving for lunch..
8. Russian Co
You have two cows. You are counting them and find out 5.You are counting again and this time there are 42.You are counting again and this time there are 12.You stop counting and open a another bottle of vodka
9. Swiss Co
You have 5000 cows but no one is yours. You are issuing an invoice for the deposit..
10. Indian Co
You have two cows. You are praying at them.
11. Chinese Co
You have two cows. There are 300 people which milk them .You are declaring that there are not layouts and a high cow productivity; you put in jail the news guy that had published the figures.
12. Romanian Co
You have 6 cows, the associated cost equals the one for 10 ,you are milking only 3 , you are acting like a mad guy and bring in another 5 people ,became bankrupt and finally you are blaming for thist the ox.
13. Family association from Prahova county financed by EU
You do not have cows. You are contracting 2 with the state and you are building up a huge villa with EU funds declaring the villa a stable for cows. You denounce the contract because the region is underdeveloped and under calamity. You redo again everything. The other people are looking dumbly at your rich villas with three SUV in front